08.23.05
Posted in at 9:09 pm by queent
I don’t recall “Curriculum night” when I was in elementary school. The first sit down meeting with the teacher was usually a Parent’s Night. Thankfully, Gwinnett has these, where the teacher breaks down exactly what their child will be doing over the course of the year. Both the Boy and I were excited about Curriculum Night. I was looking forward to getting a chance to hear from his teacher what his year will be like. He was excited to have me in his classroom “like a little kid”. And he was right, because I sat at his desk, in his little chair and felt like a kid squished i that chair…lol. As I and the other parents listen to the teacher talk about her plans for the year, she made the statement that many of us didn’t realize why our kids were place din her class. And this point I began to perk up…”Nah, I don’t know but I’m surely curious now”. Turns out, her class is an advanced kindergarten class. Can anyone begin to understand how excited I was?! I somehow contained myself as I listened to the rest of the curriculum and the difference in his class versus the normal kindergarten curriculum. We have a challenging year up ahead but we’re ready for it.
I’ll admit, I initially wanted him to completely buy pass kindergarten. Mostly because his birthday is only 16days from the cut off and he’ll one of the oldest kids in the class. i remember those kids when I was in school. They hated being the oldest just because of when their birthday fell. I don’t want him to be one of those. But I selfishly wanted it as well because I skipped kindergarten myself. My mom prepped me long before that time, so when it came time to enroll, she refused to let them place me in kindergarten and I went straight to first grade. I wouldn’t redo it if I could go back, but I do remember the challenges I faced. I didn’t have as much focus or discipline as the other kids, and so I was very talkative in class, which or course got me into trouble. I was also slower at getting my work done, so there would be times where every one else was at recess and I would still be in the classroom doing work. I don’t want the boy to be that way. I think the way things worked out have given him the best scenario possible.
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08.15.05
Posted in at 6:12 pm by queent
The boy started Kindergarten this week. I don’t know which of us is more excited. I took him his first day and once at the door, I kinda didn’t want to leave him. It was such a new experience for him; I hated to not be there for it. But of course I know that I can’t so I have to live through his retelling of his day every day. He made it through the first week without any problems…at school anyway. Now daycare was another story, but for the most part he did well there too. I can’t wait to get him into the program at the Boys and Girls Club; he has to be 6 to be enrolled. Come on September 16th!
His only complaint has been about not going directly to school. He doesn’t want to have to go to before school care; he wants to go directly to school from home. I don’t mind it; in fact I hope he keeps his excitement. But it breaks my heart that because of my schedule that I can’t take him to school in the morning. I expect that is going to chang in the coming weeks, in order to get him into the afterschool program. So long as things go as they are supposed to at work I’ll be getting a new schedule in the next few weeks.
Having him back home and readjusted to a schedule reminded me of how much I enjoy being in “family mode”. Being HotPants all summer long was fun, but it not “me”. Not all the time me. I am Mommy. I used to be Wife. I recognize that I miss that family stability. I was happy and comfortable in that family role and would rather have it that be HotPants all the time. I’d be content to stay home and take care of my family; or at least run my own business that allowed me the flexabilty to be at hom with my family. To be able to take the boy to school, and to his games (of whichever type at the time). There was a time where I never thought I’d say something like that. Me!…a stay at home mom? But I guess as you get older (yeah I know I’m not that old so what…lol) your priorites change. The mor etime goes on, the more I want the boy to have and to be happy…and a husband sure wouldn’t hurt either.
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08.13.05
Posted in at 4:23 pm by queent
I have come to understand the meaning of “overqualified” and why places won’t hire overqualified people. When you are overqualified, you become bored, bitter, and disgruntled very easily. Watching incompetent people do a job that you could do in your sleep better AND with a better attitude and aptitude pushes you past the world frustration over to realm of “hatred”.
Everyday this week I have walked into work in a good mood. That is an accomplishment considering I am not a morning person. But I have been my normal happy morning self every morning. Yet, by 10:30 – 11 I have a pissy attitude. Why do you ask? Because I hate this place. I mean really hate it, and I really try not to use that word. But I passed “strongly dislike” about 3 months ago. It’s gotten to where I openly voice my distaste (mind you I sit directly in front of management). It’s not that I am trying to get myself fired, because I will turn around and say in the same voice that I despise this place, that I don’t have to like this place to do my job well. And I do…no grounds to fire me.
The sad this is, this is not at all a normal reflection of my attitude and personality. In any other work setting, I make the best of a situation and do what I can to make the entire place better. I am that employee that goes above and beyond my job duties because I believe hard work earns your more responsibilities, promotions, so on and so forth. This isn’t some magical fantasy I developed in my head. Every other work environment I have worked in operated this way. I have always excelled in my work. I may not have had control in my love and life situations but work has always been a constant for me. But this environment is not open to that. I tried it; it didn’t work. Not only did it not work, but they were fake about it. Sure they wanted to hear about the problems, and pretend they could or would do something about it, but then one day one of the managers (we’re on out third one in 7 months now) broke it all down for me and explained that the “oppressor”: some of the upper management will never do anything about the vast amount of problems. That was my cue to stop expending my energy there and redirect it elsewhere.
It gets harder and harder everyday to remember the lessons you have learned about not walking away from a job without having another one lined up, even with trying to remember the repercussions of the past from doing that AND when trying to remind someone else to not to do the same thing…(*to that person: sweetie I am human just like you…I’m not just saying it to you because I’m not in your shoes*) I am working everyday one ways to escape. My job search has grown from just tech writing now to damn near anything not customer service related in the IT field that I think I am remotely qualified for. I network in everyway I can. And my(Twin’s and mine)business will be picking up off the ground very shortly and I anticipate much success there. Every day I try to motivate myself to believe that our business will be my way out the door and that is why I am still stuck in Hell, so that I can be able to tell the “oppressor” to Kiss My Ass.
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08.12.05
Posted in at 9:30 am by queent
It’s Friday and my toes are the cutest shade of blue…lol OK it’s Friday and I’m feeling silly and good…and no I didn’t get some thank you very much LOL. My writing block has lifted and I’ll be blogging most of the weekend. Look for me.
Love, hugs and kisses!
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08.01.05
Posted in at 9:39 pm by queent
As much as I love my adopted family, having my blood relations around is always exciting for me; especially when the reason for gathering is a festive one. I have a cousin, G, that lives here, down south of the city. Sadly we hardly every see each other; I swear I have to work on changing that.
G got married this weekend to his girlfriend, C, of about five years. I had a chance to first meet her last year when I was staying with G. At first meeting I thought she was a little snooty, but cool over all. And even more importantly, I could see her love for him all over the place. He had been hesitant for sometime to marry her. He’s divorce and was apprehensive, which is quite understandable. So when he called me right before Valentines Day this ear to tell me he was going up to Chicago to ask her parents permission to marry her, I was floored. That is so sweet, and old fashioned and I loved it. Between Thursday and Saturday, I had more opportunity to get to know her a little more. The snooty idea was blown away. C is hella down to earth, cool as hell, and still loves my cuz to pieces and that is enough for me. I hope we get to kick it more. They are buying a house a little closer to the city, so I plan to try to see them both along with my little cousins more often. G’s family came down from home for the wedding; his mom, his sister - Stace, her two daughters T and A, and T’s son, Jah. I was so happy to have them down here, I wish they’d move down here too. A is fifteen and grown up to be sunch a wonderful girl. She’s always been an honor student, and very into sports. Home has begun to drag her down though and lately she’s been getting into some trouble at home. Stace is sending her down her to stay with her dad for this year, much to her dismay. She has a similar relationship with A’s father that I have with the sperm donor so I feel her pain. I really anticipate that before the year is up Stace will be down here to stay; which means T and Jah will be not too long after her. They three of them are so tight, because it has been pretty much just them for so long, I don’t think they can be without each other. it really is a beautiful relationship they share as mother and daughters.
Lil Jah is almost 3 and my goodness he is so advance, omg!!! He had be between cracking up and in awe the entire weekend. He really reminds me of the boy and Lil D the way he is so beyond his 2 years on this earth. Because T had him so young, at 17, the only downside is he is hella spoiled. I know it’s because she doesn’t really know any better, hell shes a baby herself. He’s still young and I think she’s kinda starting to see it. He wants to listen; I know because I wasn’t having any of his nonsense this weekend and it didn’t take at all for him to take to me being a little more stringent than his mom. I have faith that she’s get it. She’s a great mom and I’m so very proud of her.Since I used to stay with G when I moved back here last year, I had spoken to all of his friends at some point on the phone. Meeting them in person…lawd have mercy!!! They all are fools…lmao What was cool to see what how different they all are and how they round each other out. We hung out at Barnacles Thursday, and they we all - his friends and C’s friends went to Vision on Friday. By the end of those two nights, somehow I was dubbed the ‘party girl’(not sure how I managed to pick up that name). By Saturday at the reception, his friends literally were taking turns trying to talk to or dance with me. It was beyond hysterical. My poor cousin spent a good part of the evening chasing them off me…LOL
Seeing their wedding this weekend…man what a feeling it brought over me. There were about 60 guests so, not to big not to small. C was absolutely beautiful! Her dress, the brides’ maids dresses, the entire setup, the reception area: all simply amazing. Whoever coordinated it did a fabulous job. Seeing it, coupled with seeing the pure love radiating from them and all their family and friends sharing in their joy…it was very overpowering. It almost made me want to have a large wedding (hopefully one day, if I can get a man first…lol). But my first wedding was small; about 15 people in total, including wedding party. I know that if I get married again my next will be somewhat bigger but the “low key” in me is happy to have a small, intimate wedding.
I miss my cousins already and I hope to see them again soon. They are talking about coming down for thanksgiving. I really hope they do, that will really round out my family holiday visits; cousins and adopted fam for Thanksgiving and my crazy Mama and brother for Christmas.
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